


Three Taps (From The Heart)

by Shadow_Rebelz



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Injury, Canon-Typical Violence, Established Relationship, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Miscommunication, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Sylvain is just dense, Sylvain's horse is named Lady because I think it's cute, actually they're just idiots, as in Sylvain gets hurt protecting Felix, felix is bad at feelings, it gets resolved in the end so yay, like really bad, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-05
Updated: 2020-04-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:22:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23050906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadow_Rebelz/pseuds/Shadow_Rebelz
Summary: “I love you.”Felix opened his mouth, about to respond but he quickly thought twice about it and closed it. Instead, he brought his index finger to Sylvain’s lips and tapped him there three times.Tap tap tapOrFelix is REALLY bad at feelings and shows his love for Sylvain in a different way (but Sylvain is dumb and doesn't get it).
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Kudos: 75





	Three Taps (From The Heart)

**Author's Note:**

> I have become an FE3H fiend.  
> I am oBsEsSeD with this game (I have spent over 105 hours on this game (and I'm still not done wHoOps!!!) and I LOVE the characters. I played the Blue Lion route first and I found Felix's and Sylvain's support conversations very interesting and cute, so, I started loving them to BITS!!!  
> I love Felix so much because he is just smol angy cat and Sylvain has a secret dark side and we must protecc him!!!  
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy my first ever FE3H fic!

Sylvain Jose Gautier, as everyone knew, was very easygoing (too carefree even) and went with the flow for a lot of things. The same could easily be said about how he expressed his affection to others. He was very vocal about his thoughts and affection (especially women because old habits die hard). Whenever he could or when the occasion would call for it, he would spout “I love you” or “I care about you”, like no tomorrow, and everyone in the Blue Lion House, actually, the whole of Garreg Mach was pretty used to it.

On the other hand, Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Sylvain’s boyfriend, was not the same. He was foul mouthed, short tempered and how most people would put it, a straight up bitch. But Sylvain loved every part of him, insults and all.

Unfortunately for Felix, with his unfriendly attitudes comes his inability to express affection. Heck he can’t even express gratitude without making it sound like he’s chastising the person. When they first enrolled in the academy, even Annette thought he was insulting her singing when he was trying to say that he thought her singing was nice to listen to.

So all in all, Felix can’t express affection **for shit**.

It was after class hours and the professor had long since dismissed them, so the boys were in Sylvain’s room studying. 

_(Actually it was more of Felix studying with Sylvain lazing on his bed for the past few hours.)_

“When will you get up on your ass and actually study for once in your life?!” Felix was exasperated at his point and was clutching his tactics textbook in his hand, debating whether he should chuck it at Sylvain’s head or spare the book the pain and set it on his table instead. 

He was leaning more towards the former.

”Hm...” Sylvain droned on in mock thinking, ticking his boyfriend off little by little until he finally said something, “Never.”

“So you’re gonna continue to sit on your bed, shoulders rolled back. arms behind your back, and legs crossed and then suffer the consequences in battle.” Felix deadpanned, and Sylvain just yawned, seemingly completely uninterested.

“All the ladies would kill to see me like this.” Sylvain teased, winking flirtatiously at Felix.

Felix huffed in annoyance and slammed his book shut. “I’m going back.” Felix stood up and in response, the chair screeched as its legs dragged across the floor, crumpling the carpet in the process. He grunted as he turned his chin towards the door and was making his way to the door to walk out of the room, but Sylvain was faster.

He reached up and grabbed the shorter one’s hand before pulling it towards him. This made Felix squawk as he tumbled backwards onto the bed, with Sylvain’s laughter trailing behind him.

Once Felix was closer to him, Sylvain leaned forward and wrapped his hands around Felix’s abdomen, before he pulled him closer to his chest. Sylvain then straightened his back posture to place his chin on Felix’s head.

Felix was now trapped into cuddling his boyfriend.

“You!” Felix spluttered and tried to wriggle out of Sylvain’s hold, but no matter how much Felix struggled and wriggled, Sylvain was always the stronger person compared to him, no matter how much more Felix trained. Eventually, Felix knew he was fighting a losing battle and he just gave up. Instead, he crossed his arms and grouchily rested against Sylvain’s chest with a red flush and a pout that Sylvain found absolutely adorable.

If Sylvain told Felix how docile he looked being held in his arms, Felix would undoubtedly shove his feather pen up Sylvain’s nose.

Sylvain found himself wincing at the image before he quickly shooed it out of his mind, just wanting to enjoy the (rare) peaceful moment between him and Felix.

Eventually, he felt Felix’s tension loosen up, relaxing a bit more as he adjusted himself in Sylvain’s grip, back sliding down slightly, head resting more on the red head’s chest.

Sylvain tightened his hold on Felix as he rested his cheek against the other’s shoulders, pressing a soft kiss on his neck.

He felt Felix jolt from the sudden warmth of his lips on his cold skin, but Felix didn’t resist, so Sylvain took that as the okay to continue without Felix mawing his neck off.

Sylvain started to dot kisses on the span of his skin like stars in a constellation in the night sky. He then moved from the base of Felix’s neck to his jawline, peppering more on his cheek as he edged closer and closer to his lips.

Felix got impatient and turned his face so that their lips would come into contact.

Felix could feel Sylvain’s smile against his own lips, and he felt his heart quicken it’s pace, almost going into a full run. He was never good with affection as he felt like his heart beginning to go into overdrive.

_Nope nope, too much, abort ABORT!_

Felix’s embarrassment got the better of him and he pulled away quickly, leaning so the side as he covered his mouth with his hand. He couldn’t handle Sylvain’s charisma, it was too much for him.

However, the kiss was a little too short for Sylvain’s liking. He leaned over Felix’s smaller frame, using one hand, he pulled Felix’s hand away, and with the other, he hooked his thumb and forefinger under his boyfriend’s chin, making him look in his direction.

Felix looked so frazzled that it was humorous and cute at the same time, with his face as red as Sylvain’s own hair, his tawny eyes wide. Chucking to himself, he pressed his lips against Felix’s again.

To spare his boyfriend the embarrassment of a prolonged kiss, he pulled back and leaned his forehead against the other’s.

“I love you.”

Felix opened his mouth, about to respond but he quickly thought twice about it and closed it. Instead, he brought his index finger to Sylvain’s lips and tapped him there three times.

_Tap tap tap_

Sylvain placed a small kiss on Felix’s finger before he looked at the other one with a quizzical look.

“Yes?” Sylvain asked, tilting his head to the side, waiting for Felix’s words.

Felix just stared at him expectantly.

“Didn’t you tap me to tell me something?”

Felix continued staring blankly at Sylvain before his flush increased tenfold and he whacked Sylvain in the crown. That moment of surprise made Sylvain let go of his boyfriend, and with newfound freedom, Felix arose from the bed. 

Sylvain was confused at Felix’s sudden change in demeanor. He wasn’t exactly the most open with his love for Sylvain, and he definitely got embarrassed easily, especially when Sylvain whispered honey-coated rose-like words to him, but Felix was never this explosive. This was a first for him.

“You **fool**.” Felix’s voice had a bite to it, but there was something else underneath his snarky tone that, for the first time in years, Sylvain couldn’t decipher despite their countless years of friendship and partnership. 

Felix turned around angrily and looked Sylvain square in the eye, his tawny orbs burning a hole in his face. It was evident that Felix was still embarrassed, so as to deal with it in Felix-fashion, he picked up the textbook and chucked it at Sylvain’s head before storming out of his boyfriend’s room and slammed the door way too loudly for good measure.

Sylvain just stared at his door, his head aching with a definite bruise forming on his forehead.

“What was that all about?”

\---

It had been about a week since Felix threw his textbook at Sylvain’s face (and he would be lying if he said that he kinda regretted it...kinda), and nothing really changed, except for the bruise that had blooming on Sylvain’s forehead.

Sylvain acted as per normal, like he usually would despite everything that was thrown at him (hah pun), and if he was being honest, Felix was a little bit irritated at it.

_(Sylvain doesn’t understand dammit!)_

Felix pushed his feelings of disgruntlement aside and continued on his way to his safe haven, away from the boar and other people from the Academy who piss him off on a daily basis.

As soon as the Professor’s lecture on sword techniques ended, Felix left the classroom in a hurry, itching to hold a sword and swing it around. He couldn’t help it, holding the hilt of a sword as more than second nature to him at this point, it was routinely.

As soon as Felix swung the doors open, he halted in his movement, eyes widened in shock.

It was expected to see Felix training by himself at the training grounds, ever the sword addict, but to see Sylvain there?! That was a sight to behold. Felix had half in mind to pinch himself to see whether he was seeing things.

“Well look who we have here.” Sylvain turned to look at him, and it was then that Felix truly noticed how hard he was training, much to his surprise.

Sylvain had tossed his outer coat to the side of the training ground, leaving him in only his white button up shirt that always had the first few buttons undone, giving him a good view of his well sculpted collarbone as it dipped down into the rest of his shirt. 

The button up shirt was also stuck to his body like a wet cloth, not only showcasing his hard and sturdy chest, but also leaving little to the imagination, his toned abdomen on full display through the now, near translucent material.

_(If the girls at the monastery saw this display, they would no doubt flock to him.)_

His red, curly flames were plastered to his forehead that was sheening with more sweat, and with not much discretion, (Sylvain’s was his so he had **many** privileges), Felix’s eyes followed a drop that trailed from his boyfriend’s forehead, down his cheek, and held on to his chin before dropping.

Moral of the story, Sylvain should train more. 

“Oh! Hey Felix!” Sylvain’s lips formed into a happy grin as he waved Felix a small little “Hello”.

Felix felt his face flush from just that stupid gesture, heart beat accelerating as he stared at his handsome partner. Not trusting his voice, he turned to the side as he walked over to the weapon rack and grabbed his wooden weapon. All part of his routine.

“Aww Felix, are you blushing?” He could **hear** the smirk radiating off of the red headed dastard.

“Do you want another bruise?” Felix retorted. He heard a chuckle behind him and he let his own lips twitch. Sylvain’s laughter was seriously contagious, and it was so dangerous for his well-being.

“Fair enough.”

Felix finally turned around and the first thing his eyes trailed to was the darkening area on Sylvain’s head, mostly hidden by his flaming hair.

He almost wanted to go up to him and cup the taller one’s cheek and apologise to him. His hand twitched as he thought about that, but...affection was never exactly his forte, especially not after Glenn died, so even if he wanted to get his point across, he wasn't sure whether he could do it in an eloquent way.

Instead, he said what he was most comfortable with, “Train with me.”

Sylvain understood.

“Anything for you darling.” 

_(Felix nearly combusted at the endearing word)_

\---

The pair sparred for about an hour, countering each other’s blows, side stepping and giving a few finishing blows to the other. It was all going fantastic for Felix and he was, admittedly, having a bit of fun! 

...Well...until Sylvain gave up. 

“Babe I’m tired.” Sylvain drawled as he dramatically sat on the floor, pushing the wooden lance to the side as a look of mock despair on his face.

“No. Get up.” Felix barked, kicking Sylvain’s white boots, getting it all dirty and dusty. Yet, the red head didn’t move.

“C’mon Fe.” oh no Sylvain was using his nickname...that could only mean one thing...

Sylvain gave his boyfriend his best puppy dog eyes and a pout along with it, “I’m tired. Can’t we take a break?”

Felix scoffed at him, “You did well enough without me here, why stop now?”

Sylvain continued giving him the eyes, which was a weird mixture of cute and hot, and as much as Felix hated to admit, it tends to work in Sylvain’s favour in winning him over.

Except this time, it didn’t work (as much...Felix was **so** close to giving in).

Felix crossed his arms and jutted his hip out as he glared at Sylvain, square in the face, in his usual condescending manner.

“Sylvain Jose Gautier, if you die on the battlefield before me, not only are you breaking our promise we made as kids, but you will make me want to kill you even more.”

“But you can’t kill me if I’m-“

“Shut up! Don’t be like Dedue...” Felix grumbled, tapping the tip of his wooden training sword against his calf impatiently.

“Yes yes.” Sylvain raised his hands in mock surrender as he got up to stand on his two feet, a mixture of sand and dirt clinging to his clothes.

“Once more.” 

Felix got into his fighting stance, sword before him, ready to strike in any second. Sylvain begrudgingly picked up his own lance as well, positioning himself so that the tip of it was facing Felix, his legs and arms bent. 

“Try not to fuck up.”

That was all Felix said before he charged and dealt a deadly strike that Sylvain just barely blocked. He heard Felix tsk as he retracted his blade, bringing it against Sylvain’s calf.

Sylvain expected that move and jumped out of his way. He put one foot in front of him and he brought his right hand out, twisting his torso as he thrusted his lance at Felix.

For a split second, he saw shock adorning Felix’s features before it quickly converted to aggression.

Felix growled as he went for another hit, in which Sylvain parried. This little dance went on for a while.

Sylvain felt himself growing tired but when he saw Felix’s little misstep, he saw an opening in his defense. With no hesitation, he lunged forward and aimed for his chest. However, Sylvain miscalculated his stride and he ended up tripping over his own two feet and fell onto the ground.

He groaned, rubbing his head. When he looked back up, he saw the tip of a blunt wooden sword aimed at his throat.

“I almost would’ve congratulated you if you hadn’t messed up.” Felix gazed condescendingly down at Sylvain, irritation scribbled across his face. “If this were a real battle, you would be dead.”

“But it isn’t and I’m still alive.” came Sylvain’s cheeky reply, which earned a loud sigh of defeat from Felix.

“You idiot.”

“Your idiot.” Sylvain’s chest swelled with adoration when he saw the corners of Felix’s lips twitch upwards slightly. Those little brief smiles were precious to him.

“You’re not only an idiot, you’re also a sap.”

“Love you too.”

Felix sighed, lifting his sword above Sylvain’s head and tapping his sweaty head three times.

_Tap tap tap_

Just like how Felix tapped him in the lips. (Is this becoming a pattern?)

It was slightly ironic, how it looked like Felix was knighting him, but Sylvain didn’t say anything lest Felix actually hit him in the head with the training sword and put him in a concussion for Goddess knows how long.

“Mercy o’Great Lord Fraldarius, I don’t want to stay in a coma for the rest of my life.”

Felix’s hand dropped to his side, his sword swinging in sync (nearly hitting Sylvain in the head like he feared), with an irritable look on his face.

“I changed my mind. I would rather you die out there then be oblivious with me for the rest of your life.”

That was all he said before Felix stormed out of the training grounds, throwing his wooden trailing sword on the rack with the others, nearly breaking the sword in the process.

Once again, Sylvain was left in the dust, confused.

\---

“As a small reminder, tomorrow is our house’s departure for Magdred Way to deal with some leftover supporters from the Western Church. Please fully prepare yourselves for tomorrow to make sure you are ready for battle. That is all.” The professor then walked out of the Blue Lion’s classroom, signaling the end of classes for the day as the rest of the students started packing up their things before heading back to their rooms.

The other students soon filtered out of the room, Felix included. The sudden reminder of their mission made Felix buzz with newfound energy, and being the keen swordsman he is, he wanted to wear himself down lest he let the excess energy distract him in battle the next day. 

He had a sudden urge to go for a walk, unorthodox and as random as it was. He couldn't remember the last time he actually went on a walk instead of training, so he thought that he might break that streak.

Felix turned away from the rest of the Blue Lion students as they diverged paths. He let his mind wander as his feet took him wherever they wanted to go. He heard many things as he went on his mindless wander, ranging from chatter he vaguely overheard from the other Garreg Mach students who were milling about in the courtyard, to some birdsong from the trees above, shielding him from the bright sun of the Great Tree Moon.

He was never one to notice these sorts of things (because let's be honest, he spends 99.99% of his life swinging a sword), but springtime in Fódlan was actually quite nice. Even though the sun was out, and it basked everything and anything it could reach in its warmth, there was a still cool breeze that resided after the cold winters, making it comfortable and easy to walk around, even in his uniform.

Felix found himself walking past the dining hall, and the path that he followed on led him to the stables. He didn't really think much of it, until he saw a familiar burst of red hair in front of one of the stalls. It seemed like Sylvain was tending to his horse, grooming her and giving her treats.

Felix leaned against the side of the wall, watching his boyfriend from afar (he was _totally not_ enamored).

"You know it's impolite to stare." he saw Sylvain's mouth turn up as he continued brushing his horse's mane.

"I don't want to hear that from you." Felix scoffed, pushing off the wall to walk over to his boyfriend. "What are you doing?"

"She's on edge today. Grooming her always calms her down. Isn't that right Lady?" Sylvain cooed, stroking his horse. To Felix's knowledge, his horse was quite young, and of the destrier breed, a light and fast horse for lancers who used spears and such. His horse was bigger and taller than Sylvain himself, and she had a shiny black coat with an equally dark, long, and curly mane that looked soft to the touch. He had seen Sylvain go into battle many times on this horse, and their ferocity and elegance never wavered. It was as if they were red and black flames dancing across the chaotic battlefield.

However, Felix just rolled his eyes at Sylvain treating his horse like how (Felix) you would treat a cat, but he didn't say anything to that (admittedly) endearing action. He was admittedly impressed, not only at how fine the horse was, but the fact that Sylvain took such good care of it. After all, it was Sylvain.

"Lady?"

"Yeah, that's her name! Isn't it Little Lady?" his horse neighed softly and he chuckled, stroking the side of her face.

"Of course it is..."

Their conversation lulled into a comfortable silence as Felix continued watching Sylvain groom and pamper his horse. Even though he was doing literally nothing, he felt very calm, and the jitters in his nerves were also subsiding. Unconsciously, he took a hold of Sylvain's free hand, startling the taller male. After all, it wasn't very often for Felix to initiate contact first.

Felix ran his fingers over the bumps and curves of Sylvain's hand, feeling the hard calluses that had formed from his time at the monastery, showing off his hard work and improved proficiency in battle. Felix absentmindedly tapped Sylvain's palm.

_Tap tap tap_

"You're tapping me a lot more often these days...is there a reason for that?"

Felix immediately froze as soon as those words came out of Sylvain's mouth, and he immediately let go of Sylvain's hand, as if Sylvain used a fire spell. He turned away and was about to storm out of the stables, but Sylvain quickly grabbed onto his wrist, keeping him in place.

"Let me go."

"Felix, what's up with you? Why do you suddenly get annoyed after you keep tapping me? I don't understand, talk to me buddy."

If that was Felix's version of relaying information to him, then how discreet was that? Nobody in their right mind would be able to guess just by a few taps and angry glares.

"I thought you of all people would understand..." Felix turned his head, muttering under his breath, but Sylvain heard it as clear as day.

"By the Goddess Felix, **WHAT** am I missing?! **WHAT** do I not understand?! I can't read minds!" Sylvain yelled, evidently scaring his horse, seeing as the poor thing backed into the farthest end of the stable. Even Felix looked taken aback. It wasn't every day Sylvain finally let loose and released the emotions he bottles up so well. He immediately started to feel bad when he saw hurt cloud over Felix's eyes.

Felix's lips pursed together, his eyes scrunching together as he closed them. He didn't want to look at Sylvain at that moment, not one bit.

"Forget it, I'm done here..." 

Neither of them looked at each other as Felix turned his back on Sylvain. He stayed there for a second, hoping Sylvain would call out for him, reach out for him, but nothing happened. The air seemed so much colder than the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus itself. Shaking his head to knock out all those ridiculous thoughts, Felix started walking, away from everything...away from Sylvain...

At least he managed to expel his left over energy...but it left him feeling far more drained than he would have hoped.

By the time Sylvain looked up, Felix was a mere speckle in the distance. He immediately reached his hand out, mouth opening to call out his name, but no words came out. It was as if his throat was parched, and all he could do was gasp and hope for someone to hear him. Felix rounded the corner and vanished, Sylvain lost his only opportunity.

Sylvain leaned against the rick walls of the stables, suddenly ten times more exhausted than he should've been. He brought a hand up and rested his face in it, covering his eyes. Lady trotted up to him and nuzzled his hair affectionately, nipping it here and there, making his curly locks stand up in the air.

Despite the affection his horse was giving him, all Sylvain could think about was the sad look Felix's eyes gave him when he raised his voice at him. He knew he screwed up royally. 

"Fuck..."

\---

After moping around for the next hour, Sylvain decided to take matters into his own hands and find out exactly **what** he had been missing, and what better way to find out than to talk to people who Felix actually likes and _probably_ confides in.

He walked into the dining hall and was pleased to find the two people he was looking for.

"Good afternoon ladies." 

From hearing his greeting, his two classmates turned around to looks at him with a smile.

"Good afternoon to you too Sylvain." Mercedes smiled.

"Hi!" Annettte piped up.

It seemed like his two classmates were currently enjoying some tea and treats (and possibly some girl talk) when he found them.

"Would you like to join us?" Mercedes smiled kindly as she gestured to the seat next to her, inviting him to sit down.

"Don't mind me if I do." he smiled.

Mercedes poured him a cup of tea and he took a whiff of its fragrance, (it smelled like Bergamot, his favourite), while Annette placed some treats on a spare plate and passed it to him.

"What brings you here today?" Mercedes asked, back straightened against her chair, yet she had a relaxed and calming aura around her. It was rather comforting. Annette nodded to that question, curious as well.

"I have...a question regarding...Felix..." Sylvain noticed how both ladies seemed to straighten their posture slightly, their lips more pursed. Oh they were listening all right. If it was anything regarding Felix, these two bright and lovely (slightly air-headed at times) ladies can become quite the hawks.

"What is it?"

Sylvain hesitated a bit, adjusting his collar. Was he just being dumb after all? Mercedes seemed to notice Sylvain's discomfort and she gently placed her hand over his, a silent assurance.

"Why does he keep tapping me three times?"

\---

As soon as the ladies heard that question, they soon relaxed in their seats. Annette even let a cheeky giggle escape her lips, as if this whole situation was amusing to her.

“If anything, I thought you of all people would know!” Mercedes brought a hand to her mouth, a teasing look in her eyes. Traitor.

Sylvain looked away, feeling a bit shameful.

"I knew you were going to make fun of me..." Sylvain bowed his head down as he leaned into his chair, crossing his arms and pouting like a child who was told that they couldn't get their favourite candy from the market.

“Then again, he only started doing it recently.” Annette pipped as she stuffed another one of Mercedes’s baked treats in her mouth, her words saving a bit of his grace.

Sylvain nodded slightly, still a bit puzzled, but when the words finally sank in, his eyes widened and he swiveled his head up to face his classmates.

“He does it to you guys too?” Mercedes let out an angelic laugh while Annette hummed a chirpy little tune under her breath.

“You’re not the only one who’s special to him.” Annette teased, sticking her tongue out at him. 

That...was true. Felix was particularly fond of Annette, and he let Mercedes treat him like a little brother, so it was understandable why he was a bit softer to these two ladies.

"To be honest, we were both shocked when he would suddenly tap our arms." Annette placed her hand against her cheek as she rested her elbow on the table, leaning forward. "He looked super embarrassed at first, and every time we asked him what he was doing, he would immediately turn away!" Sylvain found himself smiling as he imagined that scenario. Now that, he could imagine. It was just _so Felix_ that it filled his heart with warmth that his cup of tea would never be able to accomplish.

"He told us that he wasn't good at expressing feelings, and he feels better showing it rather than saying it." 

Only at those words, did the puzzle pieces finally click into place. No wonder Claude could always beat him in board games...

"He does it to express his love or gratitude for a person." Sylvain's voice was just above a whisper, but it was certainly loud enough for Mercedes to clap her hands together, pleased that Sylvain finally managed to figure it out in the end, even if he did need a bit of prompting. Mercedes then placed her hands on her lap, looking at Sylvain directly in the eyes. It startled Sylvain slightly (not that he showed it).

"He told us the reason why he started to do it was. It was because he wanted to do it for you, to make up for all the love you should've gotten back in Faerghus. He knows that he isn't the best at showing his emotions, and he wanted to find a way to work around it." Mercedes said as she brought her cup of tea to her lips and took a sip out of it.

"He can be such a sap when he tries." Annette sighed as she dramatically let out a love-struck sigh, eyes wide and dreamy. 

Sylvain suddenly felt a well of emotions rise from his throat, pushing all the way up to his mouth to finally let it go and release his feelings.

"He loves you Sylvain, you know that right?"

Sylvain smiled, raw and genuine, different from his casual and easy ones.

"Yeah."

\---

Since the events of yesterday, Felix hadn't uttered a single word to him. He pretty much avoided Sylvain, even when going to his own room to reside for the night. They were currently on the path, marching towards Magdred Way, and while Felix was usually by Sylvain's side, he was now next to Ingrid and her pegasus, his eyes focused on the path ahead, never wavering. 

Sylvain grimaced a bit, but he didn't let it show.

"Sylvain."

He turned down to see that Mercedes and Annette were trailing besides him. How long were they there for? Mercedes ushered Sylvain to come closer and he leaned down, as much as he could on a horse, to go nearer to her level.

"You'll talk about it with him, won't you?" Mercedes gave him one of her rare stern looks, her eyebrows turned downwards, her lips set in a straight line. This woman meant business, and knowing Mercedes's usual calm and kind nature, she could get **very scary** if you get on her bad side.

The corner of Sylvain's lips twitched up, showing a brief glimpse of his smile before his lips turned into a thin line.

"Yeah, I will. Not now though, after this. Then I will talk to him."

Mercedes gave him another kind smile, and she hummed with the knowledge that they would make up soon. After all, she knew how much Felix loved Sylvain, and vice versa, and she always got a little sad whenever they got into another quarrel. It felt a lot like her little brother getting into a fight with their lover.

"If you don't I'll cutting gale you out of Garreg Mach!" Annette stuck out her tongue at him, half-joking at her statement. Sylvain raised his hands in surrender and gave her an easy-going smile, but his eyes held his promise.

The rest of their conversation drifted off into something more mindless, like their favourite baked treats, or the name of the flowers that they so happen to pass by.

\---

The battle had ended, with much fewer casualties on their side compared to the enemy team, however, Felix knew something was wrong.

The battle had been easy, and it had ended way too quickly than it should've from the number of enemies they had to face. He knew it wasn't because he and the rest of his classmates were highly trained and skilled, but because of their enemies' attack patterns. It was all so... **strange**...it was as if they **wanted** to lose with the number of holes in their defenses, not to mention the absolute crappy state of their weapons and the weak spells they threw at them.

It seemed as if the professor knew as well.

She pointed her blade at the leader's throat, her gaze calm yet threatening. "What exactly are you plotting?" Even her voice was eerily calm. That's their professor all right, their Ashen Demon.

Her whole aura was like a blizzard raging across the whole of Fódlan, and any sane man would grovel at her feet, begging for mercy, or do the smart thing by shutting up and accepting their fate.

However, the leader didn't try to come up with pathetic excuses, he didn't try to run away, he didn't even quake in fear in front of their Fell Star. All he did was raise his head and looked at the professor dead in the eye, a smirk lingering on his lips.

"NOW!"

\---

"It's an ambush!"

Everyone immediately grouped together, backs faced together as they observed just how many people were waiting for them. This was absurd! It was almost as if the shadowy man Hubert himself had planned this all out with the sheer number of men that had remained undetected until now. Felix cursed himself for being too slow to figure it all out before this happened, the first fatal mistake he and his other classmates made. However, he knew it was too late to cry over spilled milk. What they needed to do was act, preferably **now**. Felix looked over to their tactician, awaiting her instructions.

The professor surveyed their surroundings, her gaze wary yet calculating as she started formulating impromptu battle strategies in that brilliant mind of hers. She motioned for the Blue Lions to stand in their respective formations, and as soon as that was in place, the battle truly began.

It felt like any other battle Felix and the rest of the Blue Lions had gone through, just more taxing as they had already used up energy prior to this surprise battle. It was rather repetitive for him. Swing, parry, dodge, slash, move on. He was one of the more proficient fighters in the group, and he felt the familiar warmth of a healing spell that Mercedes had sent his way, getting rid of his exterior wounds. However, much to his disadvantage, he made another potentially fatal mistake. 

“Felix!” he heard Ingrid’s cry from his far left. Felix had just taken another enemy, and he turned around just in time to see the familiar glow of magic in the air, dark magic to be precise. He pushed his hands outwards, casting a miasma, and it was headed straight for him. The mage was in too close a proximity for Felix to dodge effectively, meaning that if he attempted to do so, he would go unscathed and probably burn off a foot or an arm.

Felix braced himself for the painful impact, but before it could hit him square in the chest. A blur of red and silver flashed before him. It took a while for Felix to register who it is.

“Sylvain!” 

However, his cries were too late.

Sylvain, the stupid and simply **idiotic** man, charged right it front of Felix, protecting him yes but by doing so, he was now in the prime direction to get hit. Felix watched in horror as Sylvain got struck square in the abdomen by the spell. All Felix heard from him was a pained groan before he grew slack and slid off his horse. It seemed as if the professor's ability to manipulate time had come into play, because to Felix, it was as if the world and everything around him had stopped moving, except for the falling man who protected him. Only when Felix heard the metal clank of armor hitting the ground, did the world finally seem to orbit once more, and the sounds and fighting resumed in the background.

Sylvain was on the ground, motionless, his armor scalded with the familiar burn of dark magic, the spell pungent and distasteful.

Without thinking, Felix swiveled his head to face the mage who did this to his Sylvain and he snarled at him as his vision turned red, gripping his sword so tight that he felt cold liquid run down his palm. He charged towards the mage and before the attacker could cast another spell at him, Felix all but **threw** his sword at the mage, hitting him straight in the chest. He knew that a fighter should **never** throw his weapon so flippantly and leave themselves defenseless, but all common sense had left him as soon as Sylvain had hit the floor. The deadly projectile pierced through the mage, and from the other side, you could see that the tip of the blade was dripping with fresh, vermilion blood.

He heard the mage's strangled cries of pain as he coughed up fresh blood that stained the grass even further, turning the whole floor into a sea of spider lilies. Despite the mage's doomed state, it wasn't enough for Felix. For good measure, he ran towards the dying man and kicked him square in the chest, driving the sword further into him as it sank deeper and deeper until the hilt touched his chest. 

The mage fell onto his back, the sword still stuck in him. Shakily, he lifted his hand towards the darkening sky, muttering something incoherent before his hand collapsed next to him, evident that the Goddess who he revered and worshiped so much had sucked him free of life. The mage watched the dark clouds roll by with his dark eyes as he was surrounded in a pool of his own blood, continuing to seep and ruin the foliage below him, serving as his burial ground.

He quickly yanked his sword out of the dead man, breathing raggedly as the adrenaline still pumped throughout his veins. His clothes were blood stained, and so were his hands, but that didn't bother him in the slightest. This was a battlefield, not a valley of roses or lilies. Felix knew it all too well, but all Felix could focus on now was Sylvain, Sylvain, Sylvain.

Everything was silent, yet deafening at the same time as he ran towards the stupid man who protected him from the same fate.

“Sylvain!”

Felix tossed his sword on the ground as he dropped to his knees, getting mud and dirt on his already stained clothes, but he didn’t care. He propped Sylvain’s head against his chest, shaking him, trying to keep him conscious.

“Wake up!”

Sylvain's eyes didn't flutter open, his lips didn't turn into his signature smirk whenever he was teasing Felix, heck Felix had to press his fingers against Sylvain's pulse to check that he was **alive**.

Much to Felix's relief, Sylvain's pulse was still pumping, though it was a lot weaker than he would've hoped. His chest plate and plackart were badly damaged, and it looked as if it were melting the very metal itself. Felix quickly unlatched his armor to take a closer look. He tossed the pieces aside, only to see that even though the wound wasn't as bad as he had thought originally, it still wasn't exactly roses and petals. Even though his undershirt took the brunt of the leftover magic, the black residue of the magic still stuck to his skin, the smell more pungent than ever as it burned into Sylvain, and just seeing this on his partner made it all the more worse.

"Sylvain, wake up! You **promised** me. Don't you **dare** break it now." Felix's voice cracked from the damn of emotions he had kept so well for so long, but there was now a fracture in its wall, allowing his emotions to spill through.

He heard people approaching them, but he knew that they were just the Professor and the rest of the Blue Lion students. The battle had ended, and he knew that they had won, yet it still felt like he was in the middle of one as he continued crying out Sylvain's name till his throat felt dry. He felt a few droplets hit his hand, before more and more started to rain on him. The fresh blood ran from his clothes and hands into the ground below, where the soil and plants would hide all the sins that were just committed in this place without anyone ever knowing.

It was raining, as if the Goddess herself could feel Felix's panic and took it upon herself to cry tears of pity for him.

How **irksome** and **vexing**.

Sylvain heard muffled shouting and frantic cries, and slowly, he opened his eyes, though they were only half-lidded and unfocused.

He looked up at the crying sky, Felix’s blurred and worried face being the only thing he saw before his world was encased in darkness .

\---

Sylvain's eyes fluttered open before he closed them again as bright light shone into his eyes. He opened them slowly again, squinting as his eyes started adjusting to the room accordingly. Sylvain winced as his head pulsed, followed by nauseating vertigo, and his vision was slightly blurred. He felt like absolute shit, but it wasn't that big of a deal, so he could decently brush it aside and play okay.

What had happened?

They were in Magdred Way...

Defeating some followers of the Western Church...

Then they were ambushed...

Felix was...

**Felix!**

"Fe!" Sylvain lurched forward, only to wince and grip his abdomen as an explosion of pain ran across his body. He fell back onto his pillow, the bed creaking underneath his weight. Wait, he was in a bed? Sylvain looked around the area he was in. There were many beds next to his, and it smelled like a mixture of herbs and Professor Manuela's perfume.

Only then did Sylvain fully register that he was in the infirmary, back in Garreg Mach, away from Magdred Way and the leftover supporters. It seems like he passed out sometime during battle.

When the pain subsided, he slowly sat up and checked his stomach. He was wearing a white cotton tunic instead of his armor that was surely damaged after the battle.

He lifted up the piece of clothing, only to be shocked to see that there were bandages wrapped around the area. It smelled like dark magic, and when he looked closely enough, he saw that his skin was singed like a really bad burn, but except it was a burn induced by magic. How did he get this?

Oh yeah...he got hit while protecting Felix.

Speaking of his lovely boyfriend, where was he-

Sylvain heard soft snoring to his left and his head snapped towards the sound, only to find a very sleepy Felix next to him. He was sitting on a chair next to the bed, his arms and legs crossed as his head bobbed up and down, threatening to fall face first onto the bed. Sylvain was suprised that Felix didn't jolt awake when he called out his name, the man wasn't exactly a heavy sleeper. Sylvain bent down to look at his face, and he finally understood why.

Felix’s hair was disheveled beyond compare, and the dark circles underneath his eyes spoke volumes as to what he did whilst Sylvain was unconscious. It seemed as if the poor man hadn't slept in days. Sylvain sighed, raising his hand to cup Felix's cheek as he stroked the bags under his eye. The sudden familiar warmth stirred Felix awake, and he slowly raised his head up and opened his eyes.

"Hey..."

Felix's eyes immediately widened as he lurched back, leveling a pretty deadly glare at Sylvain.

“You **FUCKING** idiot!” 

“Nice to see you too Fe.” Sylvain smiled at Felix, but the flames of anger didn’t fade in the other’s eyes, if only it grew larger and more ferocious.

“You could’ve gotten **killed**!”

"Everyone has an equal chance of dying during battle-"

"You were unconscious for **days**!" 

Okay... **maybe** Felix was in fact, awake for a few days in a row. That was on him...

"But I'm here aren't I?" Sylvain brought his hands up and turned them around for Felix to see that he was indeed, alive and breathing, and that he wasn't a figment of Felix's imagination. Softer, he added, "I don't plan on dying anytime soon, you know that right? Sticking together until we die together, that's our plan right?"

Sylvain saw Felix's resolve weaken slightly as the other growled out a frustrated sigh, leaning back into his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose as he used his other arm to support his elbow.

"I know! I know you're alive Sylvain, I'm not dumb..." Felix suddenly sounded resigned as his voice turned quieter, even though the sharp edge of a blade was still present in his tone. "But that doesn't mean you can be careless and willy nilly **throw** yourself in front of people just to protect them! You're only alive because you wore armor! If you didn't you would-you would be-" Felix couldn't bring himself to finish his sentence. The mere thought of it hurt him to his very core. Instead, he yelled, “I can handle some measly mages on my own without you having to jump in like a damn knight in shining armor!”

For most people, they would quickly tire of Felix's berating and either ignore him or storm away in annoyance after taking his tongue lashing for belittling them or condescension. However, Sylvain knew better. Despite Felix’s lashing exterior, Sylvain couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corner of his lips, because he knew that this was Felix’s way of saying, to put it bluntly, “Please don’t die on me...”

Glenn’s death was already painful for him (even if he never showed it), his relationship with his father soured, and (according to him) the Dimitri that Felix once knew was no longer there. Goddess knows Felix didn’t need to see another beloved one perish before his eyes.

"I'm sorry Fe." Sylvain reached out once more and placed his palm against Felix's cheek. In a small moment of weakness, Felix placed his hand over Sylvain's, holding it in place as he rubbed his cheek against it. Sylvain swore he saw a faint glimmer at the corner of Felix's eye, but he didn't comment on it.

"You fool..."

This was a tender moment for both of them, but Mercedes's words still floated at the back of Sylvain's mind.

_"You'll talk about it with him, won't you?"_

As much as Sylvain didn't want to ruin the moment, he knew he had to bring up more pressing matters at hand. He didn't want any form of miscommunication to hinder their relationship, and he certainly didn't want him and Felix to end up like his past flings. Not with Felix. Not ever. 

Softly, Sylvain spoke, "Mercedes and Annette told me...about **that**."

Felix's eyes widened slightly and he pulled away from Sylvain's touch, leaving his palm feel colder than it should've. "What do you mean?" Felix sounded nonchalant, but he was looking away. That was a tell-tale sign that he was lying.

"Fe..."

They were silent for a while before Felix finally spoke.

"I'm sorry Sylvain..."

"Huh?"

Felix looked like we wanted to punch either Sylvain or himself (honestly both options don't sound that great) at that moment, but he stood his ground and allowed himself to show one small moment of vulnerability, especially to the person who he knew deserved it the most.

“I’m sorry...for expecting you to immediately understand...it was unreasonable of me...” Felix muttered, head hung low, his eyes looking at the chair in the farthest corner of the room. "I was too stupid and naive to understand that people need time to fully know someone's quirks...I guess...it's because you've been there for me since we were five...so I just kind of...forgot that even **you** need time..."

Sylvain didn’t say anything and Felix started getting increasingly worried. Did he offend Sylvain in any way? Was his apology not enough? Did Sylvain think he was an idiot?! Thoughts ran haphazardly around his head, and his anxiety nearly made him run out of the room but he was halted when two arms wrapped around him and pulled him close.

“Y-You idiot! You’re wounds-“ 

“I’m sorry for taking so long to finally understand...” Sylvain murmured, burying his face in Felix’s messy hair.

For once, Felix didn’t give any snarky remarks or crude comments. All he did was raise his own hands and wrapped it gently across the back of Sylvain, pressing a soft kiss against Sylvain’s shoulder.

“I love you...” Felix whispered softly, and Sylvain **swore** he could feel the smallest imprint of a smile against his skin.

Sylvain pushed him back slightly to look at him in the face. Sylvain needed someone to pinch him to make sure he heard it correctly and wasn't dreaming. 

“Say it again! I liked it!”

Sylvain must have come off too eager because Felix immediately scowled as he glowered at him, although the cute flush that was spreading rapidly across his features softened it exponentially into something more adorable and awkward.

“I won’t repeat it you half-wit.” Felix snapped in petulance, crossing his arms to his chest and turning his back to his injured boyfriend.

Yet, Felix looked over his shoulder slightly and brought his hand up to Sylvain’s lips once again and gently but firmly tapped his forefinger against his cheek.

_Tap tap tap_

_(“I’m sorry.”)_

Felix then moved to the side and pressed his fingers against Sylvain’s lips like he did weeks ago.

_Tap tap tap_

_(“I love you.”)_

Sylvain couldn't help the goofy smile that was threatening to spill as his heart burst with adoration and love for his prickly partner. Felix, who acted like he was irritated all the time and snapped at people left right and centre, when really, he was only concerned for them and felt too embarrassed to straight up tell them. This is why he loves his Felix, his stupidly, wonderful, cat-like boyfriend. The Goddess Sothis herself knew he would travel to hell and back, just for him, and only him.

“Fe, look here.”

Felix turned around only to be poked in between the brow. Sylvain tapped the exact same spot two more times.

“You’ll have a constant frown if you keep doing that.” Sylvain smiled charmingly at Felix, winking at him.

“Shut up.” Felix snarled, turning around once more, but there was no malice in his voice.

They remained in comfortable silence before Felix felt a warm hand encase his own.

“Hey Felix?”

The raven haired boy turned around just in time to see Sylvain tapping his hip.

_Tap tap tap_

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> This fic took me so long to write because school is stressful, time consuming and vibe-destroying.  
> Anyway, I hope you still enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this (even though I fretted over it for a while but shhhhhh it worked out in the end...)


End file.
